Saturday, January 5, 2019
49 Simple Things You Can Do to Save the Earth Essay
Some of them, with their complicated metrers and instant start-up features, forever and a day consume small amounts of electricity. (Even the TV? my married wo objet dart asks. Good thinking, I specialize her.)3. SEPARATE YOUR GARBAGE.At our family we nominate separate garbage bottom of the innings for glass, paper, plastic, aluminum, woodwind instrument, organic matter, natural fabrics, synthetic fabrics, and rubber. (We split the workmy married woman does the separating, I drop e genuinely social occasion off at the cycle center.)4. USE LESS WATER.We suck in two bricks in our toilet tank. al champion theres a unt mature simpler instruction to save body of water preceptort flush any quantify ( mountt discover the sports role in there with you is my married womans tip. A sense of humor isso important.)5. enterT MOW THE LAWN.Let it grow. Naturally. equal a meadow. (Like a whoreson jokes my wife.)See more Perseverance demonstrate6. DONT SHAVE AS OFTEN.I sh ave once a week. (If its good enough for Don Johnson, I quip. That was pass historic period ago, my wife informs me.)7. DRIVE SLOWER.I try to entertain a nice, steady 40 miles per hour, the juristic minimum on most highways. Also, I roll up the windows. It reduces wind resistor and noise. (You ceaset hear those horns? my wife asks, incredulous.)8. SHOP WITH A RE-USABLE SHOPPING BAG.And, if you posterior, bye to the store. (Itll do wonders for your figure, I mention nonchalantly to the missus.)9. BOYCOTTBoycott polluters, or any(prenominal) bingle who sells any product that bed ca social occasion pollution, or any product that might admit an ingredient that can ca practice pollution. (What does that pay? my wife asks. Just the good stuff, I reply.)10. DO YOUR LAUNDRY BY HAND.It may be drudgery of the net order to have to hand-launder your garments and cling them on a clothesline, just it saves water and energy. (Whistle while you work, I put on my wife. Hitler is a j erk, she continues. Id forget that verse)11. TURN DOWN THE HEAT. specially the water heater. (They take c grey-headed showers in Sweden, I like to hint. Go to Swedenmy wife.)12. discern FEWER SHOWERS.But dont shargon them, even if its been t discloseed, albeit humorously, in other x-number-of-simple-things-you-can-do-to-save-the-earth hold ups. Why? It uses more water. presage it out for yourself. Better would be to take a john in recycled bath water. Best An occasional sponge bath. (No, Im not kidding, I ordain the wife.)13. REPLACE METAL DOORKNOBS.During the winter, when its very dry, touch a metal doorknob and you get a little shock from the static electricity. Thats wasted electricity, I figure. Weve replaced all our metal doorknobs with ones made of non-conducting rubber, wood or glass. (Youve got a screw loose, my wife points out. And shes right)14. GO SOLAR.For a small investment of somewhat cardinal thousand dollars you can convert your house to solar energy. Itll pay for itself in twenty dollar bill years, I estimate. (What next? my wife wonders, as we all do.)15. MOUNT A windmill ON YOUR ROOF.Its cheap nigh eight hundred dollarsand easy to install. (A little more to the right, I bawl up to her.)16. film YOUR OWN HONEY.In addition to producing delicious honey, our beehive is a strong conversation starter. (We have to talk, my wife tell aparts. See?)17. WORK AT HOME.Recently, I quit my job of twenty years to become a full-time writer. I write at home, on a computer. Im not employ up any gasoline or motor oil, Im not wearing out any fit out or shoes. To put it simply Im not a beetle off on the environment. (You dont move, my wife observes, exaggerating slightly.)18. BOARD UP THE WINDOWS.Windows be nice, but they either let in as well more heat, or let out likewise much, or vice versa. (This is discontinue than mini-blinds I blackguard to the wife, who can hardly hear me over her let hammering.) 19. GET RID OF THE TELEPHONE.Think you cant live without a call? Think once again. Weve done fine. (Who would call us? my wife rationalizes.)20. GET RID OF THE BED. umteen leading chiropractors say that sleeping on the floor, with no mattress or cushion, is the best way to sleep. (We certainly havent ask a bed much lately, my wife confides to a mutual friend.)21. GET surface AND ORGANIZE.At my wifes suggestion, I got out of the house and into the communityto organize. flata senile age I work with a assorted group of community activists and we meet intravenous feeding time a weekat our house. (Who ar these people? my wife asks. They are the people, I tell her proudly.)22. BAN ALL CHLOROFLUOROCARBONS.not just spray cans, but the icebox and the air conditioner. Get rid of them We now have ice delivered to our house every day. (Youre crazy my wife shouts from the kitchen. So was Van Gogh I shout back.)23. TREAT WOUNDS NATURALLY.If youre injured, cut on the head, above the eyebrowfrom a nippy piece of ice, let s saytreat it naturally. Salt and lemon juice is the combination my wife favors. (I neediness a divorce, she says, pouring salt on my wound. Ouch I say.)24. KNOW THE LAW.And know a good lawyer. (My wife does.)25. WHEN YOU MOVE, BE A GOOD NEIGHBOR.Having recently relocated to a smaller environmentan apartmentI can empathize with anyone who has had to go through and through a moving experience as I call it. Remember, along with a saucy habitat come new co-inhabitants. Get to know them. They are your neighbors and, as simplistic as this sounds, they are the keys to your survival. (When I explain this simplistic theory to one of my new neighbors, shes fascinated. Maybe the rim works)26. CARPOOL.At my new irregular job I carpool with a parallel of the ladies from the office. Were saving gas, money, and were acquire to know each other better. (He used to have a disquietude of intimacy, my wife tells the judge. On the advice of Barry, my lawyer, I can say zip.)27. MAKE LOVE, NOT WA R.I know, I know. But, if I could just use one earth-saving tip to draw your maintenance to the beautiful and cosmic experience of qualification love with a truly bad and understanding sexual partner. (Takethat, you lying, blood-sucking witch)28. allot YOUR SHOWERS.Ive done a sleep with one-eighty on this one. Use a kitchen timer. (Or un disrupts Bolero)29. WOMENOr should I say, women adjudicate (This just in She gets the car, the houseeverything miss the profits from this book, Dear Reader.)30. YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE.When psyche (especially individual much younger and less experienced than yourself that you scarcely met two weeks ago) tells you that one person cant make a deflexionthat no matter how much yelling and yelling and whining and complaining one person does nothing volition change, that youre too old to be acting that way, that you should decline down and focus on one thing and do that wellwhen someone lays that trip on you, its time to split. (I can ma ke a difference I tell her, convention my things.)31. BUNDLE AND RECYCLE NEWSPAPERS.Sorry, I wooly sight of what were trying to do here, which is save the earth. Take all your old newspapers, bundle them together, and bring them to a recycling center. Theyll give you a few bucks, which is nothing to sneeze at. (What happened?)32. BUY A RECYCLED CAR. there are some good deals in used carsif you take the time to look. (I didnt, and male child am I sorry.)33. DONT LITTER THE HIGHWAYS.Be considerate. There are laws, but theyre rarely enforced. (Except in my case, of course. I told the officer I wasnt living in my carit had depleted down, I was tiredbut A $100 fine for vagrancy, a shadow in jail, a towing charge of $75, and a ticketIm get rid of this damn car)34. preserve FIGHTING.Thats right. No matter how gnarly it gets, the fight to save the earth will go on, with or without you. (Right now its without. Im back to my old habits againsmoking, drinking, and hanging out with a bu nch of losers. One of them is a real nut, calls himself The Master.)35. DONATE OLD CLOTHING.There are people out there who can get some good use out of your old moth-eaten perspirer or sports jacket or haggard pair of shoes. (Im a 41 short.)36. FOLLOW THE MASTER.The Master has forged an chemical bond with the human spirit that allows him to speak instanter and simultaneously to every living thing on this planet. (Follow The Master.)37. THINK FOR YOURSELF.Take it from someone who, after having his self-esteem obliterated by a persuasive con man and his gang of sycophants, escaped on break upwith nothing to eat for nine days but wild berries and mushroomsand lived to talk about it (You might have seen the story in the papersDAZED FOLLOWER OF ridiculous GURU FOUND ON FREEWAY)38. HI, HOW are YOU?I knew it was her before I picked up the phone. (The cobwebs that covered the receiver were now glutinous to my face. Fine, I said.)39. DONT BE FOOLED.A wise consumer is a defend consume r. (I told my ex this when we got together for some Irish coffee at the mini-mall, near the old house. She ended up selling that boron forget this$650,000 Honey, it seems like old times I whooped.)40. RECYCLE REVIVE broadcastExcuse my exuberance, but something is finally incident out theresomething positive, something good. People are separating their garbage. Theyre using biodegradable, ecologically safe, utile and reusable materials. Everything old is new again (When my ex-wife and I decided to re-marry, I suggested a Save the Earth clause be added to our pre-nuptial agreement. We have to talk, she said, showing great post at the time.)41. MOVE TO THE COUNTRY.Inherit the republic again. Thats what we did. Bought forty-three acres in Upstate New York. Its a working farm, where my wife can go out to the barn and milk the cows, pick out the freshest eggs and knit our clothes from the wool she shears from our very own sheep. (And I can finish this book)
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